shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
