i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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