i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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