I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
