I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
