Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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