Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize
