Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize