Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
