I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
he puts the penis in happiness.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
