i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize