It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm experimenting with sincerity
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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