I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
