Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
