when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
