coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
40s are totally the cure
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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