just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
