party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize