I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
