well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
