Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize