Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
