let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize