I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
