I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
