A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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