He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
