She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
