I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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