another moral hangover. fuck.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
