i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
