I murdered the dance floor call the cops
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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