Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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