Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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