quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
