We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
