your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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