i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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