his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
