don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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