You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
