I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize