: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Randomize
