My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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