We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
and you fell through a lawn chair
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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