Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize