I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
