hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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