its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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