Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize